The 115 Funniest Things to Ever Happen on Survivor


#97. Jan's Pet Cemetery
Thailand - Episode 6-9






Thailand's Jan Gentry was a very tender-hearted person. She had a soft spot for all animals, she wouldn't say a mean thing about anybody, and she was absolutely horrified when she saw pain and suffering of any sort. In short, she seemed like a very nice and a very genuine human being. She had a soft spot in her heart for just about everybody.

The problem was that after about 15 days on Survivor... she started to lose it.

Jan started to go a little bit crazy about midway through Survivor: Thailand. And it all started with a dead bat embryo that she found on the beach. Oh, there were warning signs before, it's not like she just suddenly lost it overnight, but the day she encountered the bat embryo was the day that Jan officially sort of lost it. And her break with reality led to the #97 moment on this list: Jan's pet cemetery on Chuay Gahn.





Jan announcing to Chuay Gahn that she found a dead baby bat on the beach





Of course, some would say that it's not all that funny when a baby animal dies and a human being wants to bury it. And I'll give you that one. Inherently, the death of a baby animal is not all that funny a concept. Unless it's baby seals, of course, under the right circumstances. Just kidding.

No, the funny part about Jan's pet cemetery wasn't the animals at all. The funny part was the reactions of the rest of her Chuay Gahn tribemates. Because they had no idea why Jan would bury this embryonic baby bat, they had no idea if she had lost her mind, and they weren't shy about sharing their feelings about the matter behind her back. In particular, Clay's horrified reaction to the "bat funeral" was priceless. Check out the vidcaps below:






Helen's horrified reaction to the baby bat. "Uh, please bury that thing, Jan, before it starts to stink up the beach."


Brian's amused reaction to Jan. "I was wondering if we could eat the bat first."


Clay looks on in absolute horror.


Clay does a deadpan to the camera. This is the stupidest thing he's ever seen.






So anyway the dead baby bat (whose name was alternately either "Oscar" or "Oliver" depending on the episode) was bad enough. The tribe laughed at the bat funeral, they called Jan a kook behind her back, and they thought that was that. They figured Jan would just move on.





Scooping up the bat embryo


The burial



But what the Chuay Gahns didn't expect was that Jan would hold a second animal funeral a few days later. This time, the poor victim was "Lucky", the chicken. Lucky had been a prize from a reward challenge, he ended up being dinner a few days later, and this time Jan decided to bury his feet in her little pet cemetery. She wanted to bury Lucky next to Oscar in the pet cemetery, just so the two of them wouldn't be lonely. That's right, a pair of severed chicken feet and the embryonic carcass of a bat. Together forever. Just like nature intended.





Lucky the chicken, at his funeral service


Jan during the chicken eulogy



As with before, the reaction of Jan's tribemates was priceless. Clay, in particular, took so much malicious glee out of the whole thing that he could barely stop from laughing during Lucky's funeral. This was one of the stupidest things he had ever seen and he even told us so in a confessional. Clay had no idea why people would be eulogizing a damn chicken.





"I aint never seen so much ceremony over a damn chicken."


Jan buries Lucky in the pet cemetery



Anyway, Jan's pet cemetery was something that everybody remembers from Thailand. And while her overblown reactions to each animal death (complete with funeral and eulogy) were memorable enough, what really pushed this moment into comedic territory was the fact that the rest of Chuay Gahns were totally convinced that she was insane. And I'll never forget the look of sheer horror on Clay's face... when he realized they'd be wasting two hours having a funeral for what was left of an embryotic bat.

Clay's reaction shots (and his increasingly annoyed commentary) single-handedly push this moment into the top 100.





Clay can't contain his laughter during Lucky's funeral





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